Friday, March 9, 2007

When the HOH is having a bad day

Just like everyone that exists on this planet, I have a bad day. Bad energy, ill-feelings and upset with the world. It happens to everyone every now and then. The lesson though...don't take it out on your LDD mate. It's not fair and it's bad for the relationship at every level.

Let me tell you that my job can be stressful one, especially of late because of unusual circumstances. Two days ago the stress finally got to me. I came home with a big attitude, and not a good one. I wasn't mad at Kim, but she got the brunt of what was bothering me. Through the course of the evening, I learned two things. Even an HOH has to have a shoulder to cry on, and don't engage in a spanking if your energy isn't coming from the right, loving place. In other words, don't spank if you're the one that is pissed off about things OUTSIDE your home.

After a lengthy discussion and impending argument, including calling Kim "disrespectful" (I don't know where the hell that came from), I finally opened up and told Kim everything that was bothering me at work. Kim listened, gave me some guidance and things to think about and we had a very nice evening at long last.

It's important to note that even though my day at work was crappy, Kim and I had spent a good part of the day being flirty with each other on the internet. So, my energy was mixed up. I wanted to spank her and be with her because of our flirting, but MY energy was coming from a bad place. To be fair as HOH, I should have left all that work crap at the door at the end of the day, but I didn't and Kim took the brunt of my frustration. That is the exact opposite of how I see an HOH's position. YOU HAVE TO BE FAIR! Do not let outside influences affect your LDD relationship. Your significant other is there for you, as Kim is for me. If you need a shoulder, they are there for you. If you are having a bad day, tell them...they are there for you. HOH's are human too, after all. Get it off your chest, and then move on. In other words, stop being HOH for a little bit...vent, bitch, cry if you have to...but get rid of any outside crap.

I publicly apologize to my Kim. I should have told you the second I hit the door about my day, and what I was feeling. Thank you for understanding where everything was coming from after I opened up about it. I won't make the same mistake again.

I don't want to sound like I'm preaching here, but a LDD relationship has got to be based on what is happening at home, not from outside energy or influences. However, a HOH must show his heart and confide every now and then.

2 comments:

Ree said...

Very well put. I think that there is a misconception that an HOH can never be wrong or have a bad day.

Take care,
Ree

DD Lady said...
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